I desire to cling to you today! Negativity is trying to hold me down, and I don't want to be held down I want to soar! I know your mercy, grace, and love covers me. I will choose your grace, kindness, and love today in spite of my failures. I will choose to look to you and not my struggles, failures, and sins.
Oh Jesus, thank you for loving me...
You have loved me with an everlasting love,
You will not forsake me nor abandon me, no matter the poor decisions I have made.
You love me, you love me, you love me, because that is who you are! You are love and you are faithful, never changing. You are unlike a shifting land, you are unlike waves tossed to and fro, you do not waver because you are stable. You are like a Rock, solid!
You love me patiently because You are familiar with all of my ways, you know me inside and out.
You are shocked at my stumblings, because you know me better than I do.
You know when I sit here to type, you know when I rise you eat and play.
You know the patterns of my thoughts, you know what makes my heart beat, you know what brings me joy, you know how I desire love, you know how I desire affection and attention, you know my selfishness, you know my mindsets, when I fall back into bad thinking about myself, you know when I believe negativity, you know when I receive condemnation, you know in all the area's of my life what I think I deserve, You know that I wish I had a different chair, you know my financial state, you know I have $50 dollars to my name and have to fill my car again this week, you know that gas prices are going up. You know my desire to be healthy, my desire to turn to you, you know my struggle with anxiety, fear and how I turn to food instead of you. You know where I seek comfort, wisdom, and love. You know every person and place I turn to. You know the needs I have for love, for intimacy, for connecting, to be known, to be loved, to be accepted. You know when I struggle for people's acceptance. You have put a longing and desire deep within me for you. Because you are all that I need, you are all I desire, you are the fun and play, the my deepest hunger and fire. There's a deeper connection that I long to stay in...learning to abide is what this is called and what I am craving....to listen, to cling, to believe, and hold onto too.
Deep in my heart I'm longing for more. The lies attacks me and say I can't hear you, I won't hear you, you won't talk with me, I've walked away and can't hear you anymore, and I think there is a lie I believe wondering if you really care.
Comparison hurts our friendship and condemnation, fear....
However, I don't want to waste time thinking of negatives, I desire to focus on you.
You love me soo much, you love me, you love me, you'll take care of me, you'll take care of me, my hand is feeling better, thank you Father! You love me and are waiting to reveal this to me! I will focus on you! Thank you that my hand is not aching. My arm is feeling better, Thank you Jesus, that even unbelievers declare that everything I touch turns to gold!!!! Yesterday at school someone said that, everything my hands touch turns to gold. Yes, my hands drip with the gold of your sweet presence...because you are sooo Valuable, and make me valuable! I am so valuable to you God, not just because of what I do...but Because I am your daughter, your friend...and your lover. Whoever I am to you doesn't change based on how good I am. Whether or not I am make bad decisions as a daughter, I will still be your daughter, I am family because of His blood and I will still be your daughter. That does not change. I am still your lover, even when I'm unfaithful, Jesus is bound to me and I am bound to Him. While I am preparing myself, you still love me. Just like Ester who had to prepare herself for the King, so this is my desire. My desire is to be prepared to meet you. She went through a cleansing preparation, learning how to act like royalty. This is my desire.
"In repentance and rest is my salvation and in quietness and confidence is my strength."
This is a verse of preparation.
As I learn to rest in you. As I "labor to enter into rest" I will find salvation and peace. Thank you God.
Peace is a gift to be received. Because you are My Prince of Peace, You are within me, I can have peace, I have have mercy, grace, love...everything I need is within me through Christ.
So Lord, I believe and I declare that you are in me and will me my every need.
You will satisfy me with good things.
You desire to be my joy, my love, my hope, my provision, my strength, my vision, my desire, my love, my affection, you desire to have my attention, you desire doves eyes and a heart that is focused purely on you. Everything, everything, everything, you desire to be for me!
Everything! Everything! Everything!
So I will lay down any heaviness, lay beside the quiet waters and green pastures....
and receive as you feed me, as you love me, as you speak to me, as you comfort me, as you hold me....
...you will meet me!
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